Maddie called me "Mother" today.
"Maddie, I'm not going to carry you. You're a big girl, you can walk."
"Okay, Mother."
Two years old and she's already mastered the art of sarcasm. I almost screamed. That's, like, one step away from "Mommy Dearest."
My daughter hates me. But she is now responding independently to her bladder's potty cues, so... the scales tip. "Mommy" is to "Mother" as "Persistent Inquiry" is to "Independent Pissing"...
And she speaks in complete sentences.
Last week: "Mommy! Maddie, up!"
This week: "Mother, would you be so kind as to elevate me to a higher platform from which I will be able to reach a fork, some water, and a light socket, please?"
And she grew six inches. Seriously. Six inches.
Next week: "Mom, can I, like, go smoke crack with a 40-year-old jobless illegal alien? He's, like, toootally awesome."
Brain....cracking....can't.....see.....synapses.....loaded.......danger.....danger....
Posted by stephanie at September 2, 2003 09:40 PM